Today is the start to The Next Chapter – The Happy Book.
I am really excited – I think it is going to be so different and fun and I am hoping to be more happy – feel happy surround
myself with positive happy energy – because the negative down moments have me drowning!
So this past week – there were a few things that made me HAPPY but the one that is outstanding is my daughter
starting her year as President of The Gay – Straight Alliance club at her college. She has met some super peeps there and she
is so creative that I know she will truly have a positive impact on the club.
She wanted to know if I had any ideas about attracting members or ideas for the meetings or outings and such–so we
threw around ideas and plans and her first meeting as president was yesterday and they had a record number of
members show up….and my daughter provided refreshments, and we put together a door prize and the meeting was
a major success. Hearing my daughter’s voice on the phone of how happy she was because everything went great
really made me happy.
While we cooked dinner – she spoke about it non-stop -filling me in on all the little observations she made
was just so fun- hearing the happiness in her voice is what makes me smile on the inside – I really do feel joy that way.
So this is an awesome way of starting off this next chapter – THE HAPPY BOOK – I look forward to all it will bring~!~
Life has been hectic. It’s been down right crazy.
But I don’t think I’d change it for anything.
Okay so I’d change one detail but that’s because it shouldn’t have happened.
Lets start in March shall we? March was Grad Bash. That was, awesome.
In April.. lord. It shouldn’t have happened. But as mom already said, we lost Thor.
And Ginger just months later.
Also in April, just days after Thor left us, Prom arrived. I didn’t want to go. I just lost such an important member of my family and now I was forced to go out and celebrate being a senior. With all the pressure from my friends I finally caved and went. It was fun.
I’m the monkey in the middle.
And finally May. Graduation. We went. We Saw. I totally ruled. As soon as I walked across that stage, took my grad. pictures and heard all my congrats I busted out with the parental units and left. Woo! It was Mission Accomplished. Not impossible.
The summer was difficult. I lost a friend of mine. Jimmy Pierce. RIP.
During the school year I also lost another friend, Courtney. RIP.
Now I am in college. Yay. Its okay, really boring though. Its all prereq classes. Which sucks. So therefore its boring. Now moms back on the saddle with her blogs and groups and Im happy for her.
She needs to have some spice in her life. Woo!
Any who, ya’ll take care and have a good day cause thats muh post.
WOW – I cannot believe I have been gone for so long. I really did not mean to be gone for so long – for that I truly apologize. I think that absence was the worst for me fighting COPD and depression…I gave into it all – but now I am on the road to recovery – I am fighting the “demons” (sort of speak) and taking things one step at a time – one moment at a time – THANKS for being so patient and for your caring messages – it has all given me strength. Well now that I have blubbered off – on to the news….
First and foremost – I have quit smoking – I mentioned this bit of news on my art blog but I cannot help but mention it again..I have smoked for about 30 years…yes I know it is a nasty habit – and no it is NOT responsible for my COPD – (did not help it tho) but for me – (at least in my head) it helped to relieve stress. However one morning I woke up (jan 25th) and the desire to smoke was GONE–yes I tell you totally gone!! I have not looked back – have no cravings for it – (never had any) I AM FINALLY FREE. I have no explanation – maybe my inner spirit got tired of being contaminated by my outer weakness.LOL.
My hunnie was so inspired he also quit two months later and has not looked back. We figure to be saving about $140 a month – YAYAYAY!!
Well my daughter was in her senior year of high school and the second half of the year became extremely busy and expensive and tons of running around!! Between finishing up all requirements for graduation – there was grad bash -(seniors going to celebrate a night at Universal Studios and such), Senior breakfast, PROM -omg – that is a money rip off for young people, finals, and the insane graduation. I will just say that one of my greatest joys was watching my daughter receive her diploma – we were at a ENORMOUS arena (where the NBA plays) so we had to watch her get it on a huge prompter – but it was GLORIOUS!!!
We had some sad moments – one of my daughter’s dogs had to be put down – he suffered from blocked kidneys and a malfunctioning bladder – we were all for surgery to help him but as soon as they gave him a relaxer he passed on – once he felt no pain – he was able to let go. It broke her heart…broke all our hearts – he was beautiful!
Then our very first rottie that started off our zoo – passed away from old age – She was just short of 15 years old (which is very old for a rottie) but she lived a full and energetic life…we were blessed to have had her…just passed away in her sleep – my hunnie rubbed her head until she feel asleep for the last and final time!
If you have been reading my blogs for a time – you might know that my parents about two years ago moved down closer to my siblings because my brother owns a duplex that my parents can live in for free – WELL I am slowly finding out that my parents’s health is declining – I was born and raised in NY – lived there until I was 27 when I decided to move to Florida to live closer to my parents (who retired here) and my siblings…I mention this because my parents have no memories of NY – my father says that he has never lived in NY..
Both my parents are requiring A LOT of care – my brother has been trying to talk to them about living in an senior citizens apartment building where there are others their age, companionship, nurse always on call and individual apartments, activities etc…my father says that those places are insane asylumns, and my mother says that old people only go there when their family does not want them…so my brother has his hands full. My brother took them both to the doctors and had MRIs done of their brains and they are both suffering from dementia…not good!!! The story of my brother is too long to go into – I will save that drama for another time!
I have NOT gone out at all really – I made it to my doctor’s appointment, which is another long story I will save for another time….I manage to go to the graduation (which I am so grateful for)..but Other then that – I am a total recluse. I know that not going out only contributes to my depression BUT – knowing that and trying to change that are two different worlds for me!
Okay – the last thing that made me nuts and kept me away is my computer – I was having some problems with it before I disappeared…(lots of error messages showing up) but it took me what seemed forever to save what I could on to a new external hard drive that my hunnie got me – it seemed like my old computer did not want me to transfer ANYTHING….GEEZ – and then it happened – my puter gave up the ghost – OMG – I was devasted because I did not get to save any of my links or email addresses or addresses to any of the blogs I was reading – it has taken me about 6 weeks now to finally get in touch with the majority of the people I was in touch with…SO my point is if you would like to exchange links to each other’s blogs PLEASE let me know – and if we were in touch before I crashed or now – and you would like to continue or start staying in touch – please leave me a note –and then somehow I will get my email address out to you~! The good news in all this – is that my daughter bought me a NEW COMPUTER…it is beautiful and fast and fast and beautiful – I am BLESSED…so now I am playing catch up…LOL
As a side note – yes we are living day to day over hurricanes…FAY flooded out the state of Florida! We are BLESSED because our property is built up a bit so we did not get water in the house but our ditches and street and back yard were under water – nothing like what you might have seen on TV but enough that it makes you nuts and it seems to attract a bazillion mosquitos and snakes and ants etc etc. We got brief storms and rain from IKE (thank God) nothing major! So right now I am just hoping that the rest of the season fades away quickly and no more hurricanes decide to visit!
I have also updated my art blog – so please feel free to check that from now on too!! FINDING MYSELF.
Again – THANKS for your kind words, notes, emails, messages, comments, caring and concern…I will take things slowly and hopefully that will keep me going and help me stay in touch without feeling overwhelmed..have a BEAUTIFUL day!!
Posted in blogging, daughter, family, personal, school
Tagged absence, COPD, depression, family, high school, hurricanes, pets, rotties, senior year
When I was growing up – I truly despised report cards. My father thought that they were the ultimate in telling him about the character of his children. He could not be bothered with homework or research or anything of that sort – just report cards (he also worked 14 hour days and some weekends – so he was not around a lot). My mother could not help with homework – english was not her first language and by the time I would have to explain everything to her…it would take too long…so I was pretty much on my own. I vowed I would always be there to help my kids if they asked, with their school work. I was always checking on homework every day…constantly communicating with their teachers about what is going on…helping them with research – the whole nine yards…so report cards are important in our house but because I was so involved with my kids – that I had to see what effort they were putting forth in school because I knew the work they were doing at home.
The boys drove me a bit nuts…different stories…excuses…just endless. However they soon learned in high school – that anything less then a “C” meant you were going to have privileges taken away. That was a great motivational tool in our house. Well Crystalyn just started high school when the boys graduated – so I had to start over…she has been so borderline – I was really worrying about her. She did the work – but she is a no go on exams..just could not connect the dots – sort of speak. Her reports and research and such always got her A’s but anything like tests and I could not figure out what was happening. She has tested me the most. Well now it is Senior Year…it is do or die sort of year. You either make it or you don’t. No More Excuses – time to get so serious you scare yourself!
Well something has snapped in the child….in her 6 finals that she had taken two weeks ago – she got 5 “A’s” and 1 “B” – OMG – I am so thrilled…your final grades for those classes were “A’s” and “B’s” and a “C” – I am tickled pink!!! She was flying on cloud nine on Friday when she brought home her report card…she said she is going to frame it and hang it up…I would too! I am so proud of her progress…so proud that she found her niche…(BTW – the “C” was in aerobics – the teacher just clashed with Crystalyn – kept threatening to fail her because she was a senior and needed her class to graduate – Crystalyn does not respond well to threats at all)
So Now with only two more semesters left until graduation – she can see the light – now she is so into applying for the community college – (one of her teachers – that has taken a personal interest in her – which is a good thing – he teaches in the field she is interested in) suggested to her to go to the community college and get all the basics and foundation out of the way (and cheaper) and you walk away with an Associate’s degree in the basic of your field…it is also MUCH easier to get into a major university here if you are a transfer…so she is going for it. Before she was only interested in some design trade school (no transferable credits) so he tried to steer her away from that thinking.
She wants to work in digital designing – 3-D graphics – multi media art….well she has had this teacher all 4 years of high school. (he also had my boys for computer classes)..but he has gone beyond for her. That is because he sees SO MUCH POTENTIAL in her – I think he thinks she is his prodigy. So for the next two semesters – he has set up a computer in his classroom just for her with special programs to get her a bit of a start in the field – to learn the basics – so that she has a bit of a taste of the world she is setting out for. I am so thrilled for her – he has met my hunnie during open house and they spoke for hours about football and gator hunting and such (he is a country boy at heart) – and he really thinks Crystalyn has a very special talent for the field. She is so excited – and just beaming from ear to ear – about what is ahead…
Yes it is report card time – and it is wonderful!!!
WOW – busy busy busy….Time has just flown by…I just cannot figure out where I lost track of it all. I will say..I have finished ALL my Christmas shopping…I have about 5 cards left to send out – but they might be late…they are all out of country.
Also – my son who is stationed in Kentucky canceled (at the last minute) his trip home. It just about broke my heart. My hunnie is mad because this is typical of AJ – very impulsive and does these things on a constant basis…especially when it is NOT his money that is being wasted. I am just disappointed…I really thought he would come…but I was wrong. So it will be the three of us…and that is BEAUTIFUL… we have a HUGE turkey dinner planned with all kinds of good stuffies with it and gifts galore.
So just to add a bit more stress to my week…my daughter tells me that she needs the payment and pictures and letter for her dedication page for the yearbook by today…(this was two days ago). So I had to get a dozen prints sent off to walgreens (took 4 hours of picking and choosing) for overnight printing and had to get a money order for $275 for the full page dedication (she always wanted a full page) (with that money it better be outlined in gold – LOL) and I had to write a dedication letter to her about “whatever” I felt motivated to write.. So I thought I would share my letter here…let me know what you think:
“I hope your dreams take you to the corners of your smiles, to the highest of your hopes, to the windows of your opportunities, and to the most special places your heart has ever known.”
We never knew so much LOVE & JOY could come from having a child.
Your sense of humor and spunk for life and creative thinking amazes us…and your compassion for others makes your heart bigger then most adults we know.
Our pride in you grows daily as does of course our LOVE..if that is at all possible.
You have strong convictions and will fight tooth and nail for your family and friends and those that you care about.
You have a massive soft spot for animals-which shows the depth of your kindness..and you speak your mind no matter what the circumstances or consequences. Showing that you stand strong in your faith and beliefs – that you are a leader and not a follower.
We are very proud to say you are our daughter..and although you are spreading those beautiful wings of yours and going out to claim your life…We wish for you the VERY best of all that life has to offer..
CONGRATULATIONS on your first step to life’s opportunities..
Smile always to show kindness to others
Laugh to enjoy the fullness of life
Love to always be filled with unending joy
Dream to strive for the best of everything…
Follow your Dreams – Believe in Yourself – Be You
We Wish You Enough….!!!
She thought it was awesome – so that is all I care about. This morning she turned everything in so she is happy and that makes me happy!!! Now we still have to pick out invitations and memory goodies and measurements for caps and gowns. (this is ALL more money) I know I keep mentioning money but it just seems that companies take every opportunity to charge you unbelievable prices for some crazy stuff. She did FINALLY get her senior portraits back and her class picture (almost 900 students in one picture) they do a panoramic picture of the class – you do have to LOOK to see where your kid is…that was another 40 dollars.(just the class pic) Her portraits were $215.
We never got our lights on the house done…just too much for us right now. But I did manage to get a picture of the little tree by our front door….my camera’s battery was running low so the lights got swirled in the picture…but here it is:
I think it has a cool effect….so that is our Christmas tree…everyone who has seen it LOVES the idea and have claimed they are going to do that also…LOL. I think I have started a trend….LOL .
For now I think I have updated all that has happened. I have really had a WONDERFUL
holiday season so far…some BEAUTIFUL
people who I have met through blog land have sent me things that made my heart cry – they have touched me so much…I have some surprises for them…(might be late
) but I hope they love it nonetheless. I have continued every day to blog and create in my art blog (FINDING MYSELF
)- which for me is BRAVE
because it is putting myself out there for all to see and judge…and so far – KINDNESS AND LOVE
is what I have been shown….I AM BLESSED
If I am unable to blog here before Christmas – I wish you ALL a very BEAUTIFUL and BLESSED Christmas filled with JOY – HAPPINESS – and LOVE!!!
Remember to HUG those you LOVE!!!
Posted in art, daughter, personal, school, son
Tagged Christmas, Christmas Tree, daughter, dedication letter, gifts, pictures, school activities, son
I know I am so behind in keeping this blog updated….so much going on.
I do keep my original blog more frequently updated then this one…so if you ever want to see what is happening..here is my other blog : ELLIE’S CRAZY LIFE
I have just finished participating in a month long challenge of creating art everyday in my art blog – FINDING MYSELF – that was a tremendous learning experience and something that I grew from. I have made some new friends and strengthened other friendships…I received some WONDERFUL support..especially from my friend Anke, whose kind words and encouragement really help motivate me and kept me going…if you have a moment – check out her blog called THE ARTIST IN ME – her work is fabulous!
My son did manage to make it home from Arizona to say Good-bye to us before being deployed out. He was only here for 3 and a half days…too short…of course I cried my eyes out when he left….I could feel my heart breaking…but the good news is we have heard from him on a regular basis. He is still adjusting to life there…and through our conversations I have compiled a list and shopped for things that I know he will appreciate. So This coming monday or tuesday at the latest we will be sending him a care package for Christmas…I just hope he gets it in time…I cannot tell you all yet what we have bought him because most of it is a surprise for him and I don’t want to take a chance of him reading any of my blogs and figuring out what we got him. I will say – he will be so SURPRISED and love it all!!!
My other son who is stationed at Ft Campbell -Kentucky, will definitely be home on December 14th. The ticket has been purchased and all the plans are finalized. It will be wonderful to have him home…AJ has this wonderful talent of making me laugh no matter what is going on. He has such a beautiful spirit about him..We have a few surprises for him too!!!!
Crystalyn never made it to my parents…the airfares were OUTRAGEOUS…it is more expensive to fly in state then fly to Europe….so she stayed home and we had a wonderfully peaceful Thanksgiving full of so much delicious food (with leftovers that lasted 3 days after) She had a wonderful week off from school and got caught up on things she needed to do – so all in all it was quite successful. Now she only has 2 and a half weeks of school before Christmas break and then she is off for just over two weeks…so she will get to spend some great time with AJ and they can go off and do fun stuff together!
The weather,unfortunately here got warm again…this past week it has been in the 80’s. That kind of weather does not promote the festive holiday feel…but hopefully this coming week things will cool off….it really is too hot for this time of year here.
This weekend I am hoping to be done with my Christmas cards and I just have to print out two calendars that I made for my parents and my hunnie’s mom as Christmas presents to send to them. Then I should be done with the major stuff….This year we bought a 4-1/2 tree for outside our front door (artificial) instead of having a tree inside the house. We have 11 rotties who are way too active to have a tree inside…and I just wanted the outside to look nice. Hopefully next weekend we will be done with anything outside decorations we are going to do. I just want the holidays to be calm and relaxing!!
I think I have caught up on all the news that is fit to print….May you all have a beautiful December…Until Next Time….PEACE!!
Posted in army, daughter, holidays, son
Tagged art, artblog, blog, Christmas, daughter, holidays, son, Thanksgiving
It seems like November is moving awfully quickly….the atmosphere seems to be getting a bit chaotic in that we are trying to get ready for several things. We are trying to arrange a flight for my daughter to go visit my parents further down south for the Thanksgiving holidays…she has off for over a week so it would be nice for her to visit with family. However right now we are waiting to hear if any flights become available.
We also have heard from our son who is leaving for Japan…the army has CUT his visiting time…he has to deploy A LOT sooner…so right now it looks like he will get here and have to fly right back out after one night. He thinks he will make it here quickly but I think that is all wishful thinking. So those plans are up in the air right now…Today he graduates from AIT and he gets to leave anytime after midnight to head home. We will see what happens.
The weather has been wonderful…so nice and cool, makes it so much easier to breathe. I have made it a point of going out every day..at least for a few minutes…a great way to clear my head…and regain some balance. I have been keeping up with my art blog (FINDING MYSELF) everyday. I signed up for a challenge called ART EVERY DAY of the MONTH. So far I have managed to create something everyday. At first I really did not think I was good enough to be a part of it…I was going to wait until next year to join it..BUT no one is guaranteed a tomorrow so I joined..People have been very encouraging and supportive, and I am finding out that I can show my art and nothing bad will happen.
My hunnie right now is putting together a craft type table for me to do all my art and crafts on…I am just too excited about it…I am thinking about collaging the whole top of it then sealing it…something different – something that says me!!!
Yesterday and today I have been feeling a bit low…I am trying to fight through it all but it is driving me crazy…(right now I am refusing to give in to those dark feelings and self destructive thoughts) well hunnnie and daughter went out to run some errands and brought back some surprises for me…one being some beanie babies…(something else I have been collecting) they are absolutely adorable and two of them are primates…YAYAY! They also brought back Chinese food for lunch (my favorite) and fall angels for my collection (so very beautiful – leaves are the wings). So today I have been very spoiled and they both have succeeded in making me feel better.
Well I think I will head outside and see how it is going with putting the top on my table. Thanks for stopping by!
Posted in army, art, blogging, create, daughter, depression, holidays, son
Tagged army, art, collections, crafts, creative, daughter, holidays, hunnie, son